Passing Opinion Off As Fact Since 2009

Passing Opinion Off As Fact Since 2009

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Kanye West's "Runaway" Teleplay Recap

I think I have made it pretty clear that I think Kanye is a genius. I cannot think of a more artistically ambitious Pop artist - ready for it - EVER. This very much does not mean he is perfect. Restraint, has never been his strong suit. Though, I would argue that subtlety would get lost when trying to appeal to billions of folks.

This past weekend Kanye West released a new music video/teleplay that highlights his artistic best and worst qualities. Pro: Every shot is thoughtfully composed and beautiful. Con: The story and a lot of the flourishes are laughably hackneyed. Pro: The music, which is completely made up of samples of his upcoming album, is great. After hearing "Power" months ago, I proclaimed Kanye would release the album of the year, I am even more certain now. Con: It has a few cringe-worthy moments that are so self-serious that they become hard to watch.

All in all it is Kanye in a nutshell: A unique combination of brilliance and trainwreck.

Here it is...

It is 36 minutes long, which is LONG. So, I decided to take a whole mess of screen shots and provide the patience-averse a recap of the absurdity, both good and bad.

Here it is...

Here we go. First shot, I wonder if he is running towards something or away?


Kanye is trying to subvert the rapper driving a sports car hip hop video cliche, maybe.

Slow-motion doe!

The story is about a sexy phoenix who falls to Earth. Kanye loves IT because it looks like a sexy human female. Kanye definitely knows what a metaphor is.

First of many gorgeous albeit incredibly cliche shots.


Sexy Phoenix learns about the news.

First lesson, Kanye hates the news.

Kanye plays a bunch of samples, creates a "beat" to introduce the real star of the teleplay...

This ladies boobs.


The giant Michael Jackson face is meant to symbolize Michael Jackson's dead face.

Yep, this happens.

Like "Pretty Women" but with a Sexy Phoenix.


1. Black people look great in light clothing.
2. "White servants! I am blowing your mind America. You're welcome." Kanye West.
3. This shot stars at least 70% of all the Black people living in Prague

Students of Dr. West's school of subtlety in cinema.
Man: "Oooooooooo. What is a Sexy Phoenix doing at this very fancy dinner party?"

Woman: "I think she is a symbol of Kanye's rebirth through art , maybe."

Shirtless Guest: "Your girlfriend is really beautiful."
Kanye: "Thank you."
SG: "Did you know she was a bird?"

Luckily there was a piano and ballet troop so Kanye can actually perform this supposed-music video's titular song.

The giant blond dancer definitely symbolizes Taylor Swift, maybe.

The lyric is "Let's have a toast" so the scene MUST respond accordingly.

Then there was a series of epic slow-motion shots of ballerinas being awesome.

It is hard to capture this in a still screen capture, but they were all fixed in this position for a minute or so. Awesome.

He has his hand over his heart because that is what hurts.

They all liked the dancing, except that girl in the front. She claps but is thinking, "What pretentious bullstuff."

Shit just got real

Horribly acted, awful dialogue eventually cuts to the chase.

In Kanye's world he must have sex with his symbolic mythical creatures.

This sex scene was soundtracked by Bon Iver's "Woods". I wonder if during its recording Justin thought, "I bet one day Kanye will bone a Sexy Phoenix to this, somehow symbolizing his artistic rebirth after he yelled at that tall blonde girl who looks like a bunny."

This is a very classy way of visually saying the sex is over.

Of course Kanye wakes up on the roof. But wait, the Sexy Phoenix is gone.

The sample says "woods" and the video is titled "Runaway" so Kanye makes it so.

Who would have guessed a Phoenix would arise?

Slow-motion doe.

The foreshadowed running (away) Kanye.

The symbol for Kanye's rebirth is sad to leave Kanye, who symbolizes the real Kanye, maybe. Also she has a gold plate over her boobs now, which definitely symbolizes his acceptance of the realities of our materialistic society, maybe.

Rebirth complete.



Starring: Booby Mcboobstein

Read: "Actually Directed By HYPE WILLIAMS"

She wins.

Kanye has famous friends.

Also wins.



The End

Slow-motion doe.

1 comment:

  1. Am I a short blonde girl who looks like a bunny? I enjoyed this, Fox in Sox.